The West European Hedgehog

Hedgehog an endangered species

The latest UK List of Priority Species and Habitats¹ which has just been published includes quite a few shocking items. One which would surprise most people is the common garden hedgehog. The continuous attack from being used as footballs, burnt alive in garden fires, spiked by garden forks, squashed by cars and being used as a crisp flavour² has finally taken it's toll.

So if you do want to see our prickerly garden visitors in the future I suggest you put out a saucer of cat food or slugs to help them on their hazardous potter through our habitat.

1:After two years of work involving in excess of 500 people, the proposed UK List of Priority Species and Habitats was presented in a UK BAP website report in June 2007. The Priorities Species and Habitats Review Working Group and the Priorities Review Group recommended that this list was formally adopted. The Governments of all four UK administrations have now adopted the recommendations of experts and published the UK list of priority species and habitats. The new UK BAP list is an important reference source, bringing all the scientific information on UK BAP species and habitats together in one place.
This list, a result of the most comprehensive analysis ever undertaken in the UK, contains 1149 species and 65 habitats that have been listed as priorities for conservation action under the UK Biodiversity Action Plan (UK BAP).

2: No hedgehogs were actually used in Hedgehog crisps, Hedgehog flavoured crisps were actually flavoured with pork fat and no hedgehogs were used in the manufacturing process. Consequently, it wasn't long before Hedgehog Foods Ltd was in court (1982), up against the Office of Fair Trading, on a charge of false advertising.Bizarrely, a settlement was finally reached when Mr Lewis, of Hedgehog Foods, interviewed gypsies who actually did eat baked hedgehogs, to ascertain the flavour of hedgehogs. Mr Lewis then commissioned a flavourings firm to duplicate the flavour as closely as possible and changed the labels from "hedgehog flavoured" to "hedgehog flavour".

Google Sky

Google have just launched their newest tool. 'Google Sky'. An astronomical 'add-on' of Google Earth. The program allows you to discover parts of the universe only seen by the Hubble telescope. This concept is nothing new though, back in the 80's Ian Bell and David Braben created 'Elite' for the BBC microcomputer. "Now where should I fly".

Google Sky

Control

Cascade

Cascade by Matchbox®

I was perusing a website about 70's and 80's games when I saw an old Christmas present that I received which was really good for about 2 weeks and then never seen again. It was a game called 'cascade'. I remeber thinking it was a load of rubbish when I first opened it but once set up the ball bearings bounced along the three rubber drums perfectly landing in the scoring bay and would be raised up to the top again by an archimedes screw type affair. A bit Heath Robinson but amazing to watch.

Lizzie's Wall

Middlesbrough amateur photographer, Jason Hynes, had one of his photographs selected for the new Tate Britain's exhibition; How We Are: Photographing Britain.


Photo of a wall and a door

Jason describes his photo ('Lizzie's Wall') : "The image is from a series about how we all change and progress in life and I chose the image for the competition because I think it conveys a sense of longing. Whether it be for the good or the bad Britain is, culturally and economically, constantly changing and developing. I feel my photograph freezes this evolution and holds the viewer in a place and time that is safe and comfortable but the imagery contained within the photograph, the door, the blossoming fruit, and the shaft of light, show that growth and change is inevitable and constant. "

Balloon Fart

The Balloon I should have been on yesterday evening.

Yesterday I won a 'balonvaart' (Hot air balloon trip) on a local radio station (Radio Meerssen) competition. It was the star prize in a 'vacation top 100' competition. I only entered it as I was disgusted by the choice of most people's top 5's. So I put mine is with 'The Smiths, Joy Division, New Order, The Stone Roses and Happy Mondays'. Needless to say none made the top 100.

Anyway they rang up and said that I have won the 'star prize' of a hot air balloon trip and could I come in live on the radio show on Tuesday to pick it up.

They actually wanted to present the prize to me yesterday and take the trip there live on the show which was being transmitted that day from a small caravan site. But as I was out they gave the ride to other volunteers at the event.

Strangely enough whilst sitting here at the PC I then saw the balloon floating towards the house with the volunteers on board. They landed somewhere in Belgium.

I've always wanted to take a trip in a balloon but now I have the chance I have to admit I am bricking it.

Tony Wilson

Mahjong : Public Health Warning

Mahjong - The most complicated game on earth

My Mother bought a Mahjong set about 30 years ago but we never actually played the game. Which I always thought was a bit of a shame as it cost a lot of money. But it seems we might have been better leaving it on top of the wardrobe as it has emerged that mahjong can actually be bad for your health.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/6931119.stm

Radial Velocities in the Zodiacal Dust Cloud

Brian May is friends with Glockenspiel maestro Sir Patrick Moore

Brian May has finally handed in his PhD 36 years after starting it. Mr May decided to not complete his PhD and instead pursue a musical career with the pop group 'Queen', fronted by rockstar legend Freddie Mercury, back in 1971.

But after a recent research trip to Tenerife he decided to start work on his thesis and today handed in the 48,000 word work to Imperial College, London.

The thesis entitled "Radial Velocities in the Zodiacal Dust Cloud", studies Radial velocities in the Zodiacal dust Cloud.

Panorama

Panorama showed on Tuesday the huge amount of child violence being posted on YouTube. The Google run company repsonded that they have '0' employees in charge of vetting such videos and it was the 'YouTube' communitie's resposibilitiy to 'flag' and remove such videos.

So the next morning I searched and found 5 school/street fight videos online and flagged them as "Inappropriate".

Google, and YouTube have said they will review them usually in 20 minutes of flagging.

2 days later and all 5 videos are still on line.
One of these I found was from Middlesbrough. Makes you proud!.

If you do take a look make sure you click the flag as "Inappropriate" button below, if we click it enough times maybe the 1 employee might get a 'heads-up'.

But I would suggest you don't watch. God I sound like Panorama.

The second one is the lovely Boro one.

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Always start with a strong coffee

Yesterday the pilot of a 105 meter cargo ship fell asleep at the wheel on a canal in Holland. Fortunately the family of 4 inside their holiday home were not hurt.

Happy as Larry

1 and a half weeks in and they are getting on now, but mainly when food is the issue.

These two do 'best mates' dances around their dishes.

They eat from their own then swap and then share.

P.S. They are Clogs

Little Gem

Little bundle of fur 'Gem' - name after the diamond shape on her back

Today I went for a walk in the 'Eijsderbeemden' to enjoy the sunshine which we have unfortunatley not seen for almost two weeks now. I came back to the entrance of the nature reserve and saw a tiny little creature mucking about in the waste bin overflow licking beer cans.

It was the cutest little cat. Strangely enough I wandered past thinking someone else will sort it out but as I reached the car I thought to myself 'who will look after it'?. I looked around and the nearest house was 1 mile away. So I asked a local Dutchy who was on his' Jollies' who fortunately had enquired about the dierenambulance' (RSPCA) numbers and programmed them into his phone.

Both numbers didn't work so I decided to take the 'little one' into the car after some protest from my dutch friend. His son had already become fond of the cat. But I drove on to the nearest building to ask if it was maybe theirs.

As they replied 'no' and supplied me with a box, we and two oldish women walked to the car to pack our little one into the box to transport it home. It was going quite well (scruff of the neck technique) until the two 'mature ladies' decided they wanted to pet and 'ooh and argghh' at the kitten. At which point it freaked out and wanted to escape. Due to the fact we were on a pretty busy road I held on for my life to it's neck while it protested and fought for it's freedom.

One of the ladies asked me 'Did he get you?'. I replied "No". But she said ' I think he did". I looked to my arm to see 7 bleeding wounds.

Back home we introduced the kitten to Spike much to his disgust. And a hissing fit followed, growling etc. for the rest of the night. Spike is very displeased with his house guest. A 6 week old kitten. (The big brute). Probably more disgusted because this little frail kitten is getting all the milk and food it asks for and cuddles galore.

So my mission tomorrow is to hopefully find the owner of this bundle of fur. Otherwise it might have to be a decision for the 'cat home' or 'our home'.

Gorillaz to Monkey

Jamiie Hewlett and Damon Albarn are following up their succesful collaberation with 'Gorrilaz' with a foray into the world of Chinese Opera. Last night on Alan Yentob's "Imagine" the programme followed them through 2 years of hard work to realise the project.

The Opera opened in Manchester last week at the Palace Theatre. The story of 'Monkey' did not originate with the 70's TV series as Albarn and Hewlett originally though but it is an ancient Chinese story going back hundreds of years.

After a spell in Manchester the production will move on to Paris.

Ahhhh Piggsy!

Kylie Cyber Woman

No, not an online simulated experience with the pint-sized Aussie sex-bomb, Kylie is going to star in the hit-series 'Doctor Who' this winter as a 'cyber woman'. David Tennant is said to be literally foaming at the mouth at the prospect of Kylie in a vinyl cyber suit.



Ms Minogue

Test Match Special

Whilst back in the North-East I went to the West Indies v England Test Match at the Durham County Cricket ground. It was a present for Fatha's 70th birthday but everyone thought it a good plan so we all went. Not a cheap affair!. 7 people @ £42 per ticket. Mother made ham sandwiches and I prepared a flask of tea to economise a bit on the day but I have to admit I was enticed by the 'dirty burger' stand with it's attractive 1/2 mile queues.

It is a boring game cricket at times and we didn't pick the best day to go, but at least we didn't pick Friday when not a single over was thrown. Anyway my sister's boyfriend came up with a good game 'Spot the celebrity'. The 'posh stand' - The 'Don Robson Pavillion' was directly on the other side of the ground so with the aide of binoculars we scanned for the stars.

After a few false alarms, Fern Britten, Jim Bowen etc. I heard on the TMS commentary that Bobby Robson was watching from the balcony so I quickly scanned the corporate boxes and found a 'silver haired' guy who I then pointed out to everyone. Later I found the real Bobby. I kept a bit quiet about it though.


Will the real Bobby please stand up

Hoegy Drought

My drink of choice if I am going to a bar is usually Hoegaarden. Last night we went for a 'Ruby' and did a mini bar-crawl on the way back to our regular to finish the night of with a game of darts. I was very disappointed to find in all 3 bars no Hoegy was available on tap.

By the 3rd bar I had got so incensed that I asked the Landlord why? 'Dodgy beer' came the reply. Apparently Hoegaarden have closed their brewery in 'Hoegaarden', a small Belgian village inbetween Maastricht and Brussels. The new brewery is in Jupille, where Jupiler beer is made in South Belgium.

Problem is they are having teething troubles getting the first batches of Hoegy right at the new brewery and therefore due to the popularity of this beer it has quickly become a drought.

It is not only here in Holand and Belgium which was the original market for the beer but now it has been marketed so well the problem has extended to the UK where Hoegy lovers are wondering what the hell is going on.

Fortunately here in Maastricht we produce another fine 'white beer' which during the Hoegaarden explosion on to the world market has been incompetently slow at 'taking a piece of the pie'. So 'white beer' is still on the menu if you want a 'Wieckse Witte' formally brewed on the side of the Maas in Maastricht, but now by Heineken.

Mr Interactive

Tim Booth obviously learnt to ineract with the crowd in his early days. Can be seen very clearly in this performance of on of my faves.

How much for your chuddy

The Schmidt 'Hot Jet' Chuddy destroyer

I watched a documentary tonight about 'chuddy'. Wrigleys owned 98% of the market in the UK till Cadburys decided to get in on the deal. And with the release of "Trident Splash" they have quickly cornered a 15% chunk of the market. Wrigleys are not that 'bovvered' though as the chuddy sales have also increased by 15% since it's launch 6 months ago.

The documentry showed the Wrigley's PhD doctor emphasing the health bonuses of chewing a petro-chemical product. Helps with mastication, aiding dental care, helps with mental awareness. etc. etc. No wonder Sir Alex Ferguson is a staunch user of the product.

The documentary went on to tell of the hidden costs of a piece of 'Chud'. Most local councils are having to invest in a peice of German hardware to clean the streets from 'post-masticated chud bombs'. This vehicle costs £100,000. Plus it doesn't do the job properly so council employees are having to follow it around with high pressure water machines to clean up the rest of the gum.

It has been estimated that 80% of chewed gum is left on the streets. Chewing gum was brought to the UK by our American friends during the war. I think we should go back to our original chew of choice the Liquorice-root. I recently went into a dutch health shop to purchase a few sticks and they cost 20 Euro-cents. They last a lot longer than Cadbury's 'Splash'. Also they don't require any German Hardware.

The Cadburys company has launched a big advertising campaign to help it's attack on Wrigleys. The marketing 'bods' came up with the phrase 'Mastication for the Nation'. But they do have a banner on the bottom of their site promoting 'Resposable Mastication', i.e Put your Petro-chemical based product in the Petro-chemical based bin liner so our Petro-chemical vehicles can despose of them properly in a land-fill site.

Pond Life

Kermit with red cheeks - "The tanning experience"

When we moved into our place I found a sand pit in the 'back gard' which I quickly decided to turn into a pond. It doesn't take long before such a creation becomes an attraction for all sorts of wildlife and it is now breaming with frog spawn in early spring-time. As the months get warmer we are spending the evenings in the garden and I decided to put the pond light into the pond yesterday to enhance the garden experience. Only to find a frog knicking the limelight and destroying our enjoyment. Obviously I set the cat upon it and it was quickly destroyed.

I forgot to recognise that the cat prefers to lick frogs then go into a strange cross-eyed stupour for the next two hours whilst the frog disappears into the depths.